Fairy & the Beanstalk as retold by Ima Fairy

Once upon a time there lived a middle-aged fairy who had a little fairy named Weston.  Weston was a good little fairy but he didn't have the brightest tail on the block.

One day, Weston's mother said, "Weston, we have nothing left to eat in our hut save one small bean. You must take Bullah the Cow to market and sell her for a fair price. We will then visit Tom Thumb's and buy all the bread and roasted lamb that we can eat!"

"Yes, mama," Weston eased out, quite happily. He would be thrilled to haul Big Bullah into town to market for she had something very wrong with her, a tumor of sorts on her underbelly. It just wasn't healthy having her around, for who knows what she could give them?

Weston skipped happily to town, Bullah waddling behind him, her large tumor swinging along the way.

By the time they reached town, all that banging must have damaged Bullah's tumor, for it was large and swollen, like his winner sometimes got whenever he was lucky enough to roast one over a fire. And the blacker, the better, for a winner wasn't truly roasted until them.

Weston met a man wearing a top hat along the way. He spoke with an English accent that sounded a bit funny and silly to Weston's flared fairy ears.

"Woe, boy! Where are you taking this fine heifer?" he asked Weston.

"To market so my mom and I can raid Tom Thumb's," Weston told him with an innocent-looking face.

The man observed Bullah's tumor. "What if I give you a bean for this damaged old cow? You won't even get that at the market."

Weston scratched his fairy hat. "You are probably right. But mama said to take Bullah the Cow to market. I must be a good fairy and obey her."

The man leaned over and whispered to Weston, "What does she know? She's a woman."

"Oh! So right!" Weston agreed, and with that, he handed Bullah's reigns to the man and held out his hand for his bean transaction.

"Is this a magic bean?" he asked the man who now supported a smile. Little did the fairy boy know that Bullah would live a very rich and full life in his extra large barn. Her payment would be her fresh milk. He would be very good to Bullah, much better than this idiot boy.

"No, it's a Great Northern Bean," the man told him. "Now, get along, boy, I've work to do and places to go. Come, Bullah!"

Weston was still scratching his fairy hat as he watched Bullah and the stranger disappear from site.

He felt bad. It wasn't quite right, him getting a nice fresh bean and the poor old man a damaged cow.

That thought bothered him a good thirty seconds, then he began skipping towards home.

When he got home, his mother ran to greet him.

"Weston, my dear boy, how much did you unload Bullah for at the market?" she asked in an excited tone.

"I did very well, mother," Weston told her with a beaming smile. "I traded her for this bean!"

He held out his hand and his mother's face fell as her eyes touched the bean.

"It's a Great Northern Bean, mama! We will plant this and have many beans. We will no longer be hungry."

"You idiot!" his mother tossed out impatiently, snatching the bean from his wet palm. "This is a magic bean! We'll be rich, Weston!"

Alas, it came to pass. Weston and his mother never longed for anything ever again.

As for the stranger, Bullah the Cow tripped and fell on him as they continued their journey homeward. He was crushed instantly and Bullah danced away, down the trail. She met a very handsome bull who had a sister named Elsie Bordon. And they, too, lived happily ever after!

The End

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